All about Self-esteem by Teru Nakashima, Japan
Teru Nakashima: A Pioneer in Self-Esteem Psychology
# Teru Nakashima: Leading Voice in Self-Esteem Psychology
Teru Nakashima is a prominent Japanese psychological counselor, author, and public speaker who developed "Natural Psychology," an approach to enhancing self-acceptance and transforming lives. After overcoming severe personal struggles, including a decade as a hikikomori (social recluse) and multiple suicide attempts, he independently studied psychology and therapy, developing methods that led to his own recovery and eventually helping others.
## Core Theory and Methodology
Nakashima's theory of self-acceptance centers on six fundamental elements:
- Sense of Existence: Feeling one's life has value
- Sense of Competence: Believing in one's abilities
- Sense of Belonging: Feeling accepted in society
- Sense of Security: Having a safe space
- Self-Trust: Being reliable and dependable
- Self-Esteem: Recognizing one's inherent worth
His methodology follows three key steps:
1. Self-Recognition: Acknowledging all aspects of oneself
2. Self-Acceptance: Embracing one's complete self
3. Self-Affirmation: Recognizing one's inherent value
## Impact and Work
Nakashima has authored several bestselling books, including "Three Steps to Enhance Self-Acceptance" and "How to Love Yourself." He conducts training sessions nationwide for corporations, educational institutions, and hospitals. His YouTube channel and daily newsletter provide practical guidance on self-acceptance and personal growth.
His unique contribution includes the concept of "mental brakes" - unconscious blocks formed from past trauma and negative thought patterns. He teaches that true self-acceptance isn't about forced positivity but embracing one's authentic self completely. Nakashima also introduces "fudoshin" (immovable mind) as the ultimate state of self-acceptance - maintaining inner stability regardless of external circumstances.
His work particularly resonates in Japanese society, where issues of self-worth and social pressure are prevalent. Through seminars, books, digital content, and counseling sessions, Nakashima continues to provide hope and practical guidance to those struggling with self-acceptance, while his principles are increasingly applied in organizational development to improve workplace relationships and employee well-being.
All about Self-esteem by Teru Nakashima, Japan
Navigating Self-Doubt Through Tarot
A powerful exploration of how tarot can be used for self-discovery and growth, guided by Teru Nakashima's insightful methods. We dive into a profound session and unpack the lessons learned about overcoming self-doubt and embracing personal challenges.
• Introduction to tarot and its transformative potential
• Breakdown of Nakashima's approach and the client’s situation
• Highlights of the Strength, Lovers, and Star cards and their significance
• Practical advice on managing tasks and seeking support
Remember to cultivate self-awareness, resilience, and compassion as you navigate your life's challenges!
Teru Nakashima, All about Self-esteem
All right, so get ready, because today we're diving into the world of tarot. Oh cool, but with a bit of a twist. Okay, you know you sent us this transcript of a session, and it's with Teru Nakashima.
Speaker 2:Right, yeah, Nakashima.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you know, in Japan he's like huge for all his work on self-esteem, and so we're going to unpack how he actually uses tarot to work with a client, and this client is battling well two things really okay. Low confidence, right, and uh, a deadline that's coming up pretty fast oh, I know that feeling.
Speaker 1:Yeah, everyone does so what's so interesting to me right off the bat yeah is that the whole session it's in japanese and you can just tell like right away that Nakashima he isn't focused on, you know, like predicting the future or anything.
Speaker 2:It's not about fortune telling. No, not at all it seems like it's more about like using the cards to kind of guide the client towards action. You know helps them build their self-belief.
Speaker 1:It's like he's using the cards almost as a way to have this conversation with the client, subconscious.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, bringing all these hidden thoughts and feelings just up to the surface Totally, and you know what the client's situation is, something I think a lot of us can relate to. Oh, for sure you know they've been procrastinating on this task. The deadline is like right around the corner and their self-doubt is just spiraling.
Speaker 1:Like a downward spiral.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And they even say to Nakashima like you know, I feel paralyzed, like the pressure is just too much. Yeah, but before they even get to the cards, nakashima has them do like breathing exercises Interesting. What do you think about that?
Speaker 2:I think it's smart. Yeah, think about that. I I think it's smart. Yeah, I mean, he clearly understands the connection between you know how we feel, like our emotional state and our ability to actually think clearly, right? That feeling of I can't do this, you know, it's often rooted in anxiety, right?
Speaker 1:not a lack of capability yeah, so he's really trying to create like a sense of calm before they even like touch the cards.
Speaker 2:Yeah, get them grounded, smart yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, so the first card he pulls yes Is strength, yeah, but it's reversed.
Speaker 2:Ooh interesting. So what does that tell us? What does he say?
Speaker 1:Classic indicator of, like you know, that inner strength is blocked.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:The clients, you know, their usual drive, their determination. It's all being kind of overshadowed by this urge to just like.
Speaker 2:To just avoid it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, withdraw, avoid the whole thing. And this is where I think Nakashima. Just, he uses this brilliant analogy of a tree. Oh so he describes the client's self-esteem as the roots of this tree, which you know, they're a little shaky right now but they're still anchored.
Speaker 2:Still there.
Speaker 1:What I love about that is that it's both accurate and de-reassuring at the same time.
Speaker 2:Totally. He's not sugarcoating it right. I mean, the client is struggling, but he's emphasizing that even when you know, even when our self-esteem takes a hit, there's still that core strength that you can tap back into.
Speaker 1:It's still there, so the roots are there, you just need a little TLC.
Speaker 2:A little love.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:So what's next?
Speaker 1:Okay, so next card is the lovers.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Which you know, usually that has pretty positive connotations.
Speaker 2:Yeah, sure Choice partnership.
Speaker 1:you know, usually that has pretty positive connotations yeah sure Choice partnership.
Speaker 2:You know connection Connection right.
Speaker 1:So how does that work with this client situation?
Speaker 2:Well, what's interesting is Nakashima. He kind of picks up on this tendency.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:In the client to try and do everything solo. Oh yeah, Like they have to handle this all alone.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:And so the lovers appearing here is a direct challenge to that mindset.
Speaker 1:Interesting.
Speaker 2:You know, it's like the cards are saying hey, look around, you have support.
Speaker 1:You don't have to do it all yourself.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it ties into that thing. We all think, you know, that asking for help is a sign of weakness.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 2:When actually it can be incredibly empowering.
Speaker 1:Yes, and the lovers it also brings in, like that element of choice.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Right, and Nakashima emphasizes how each decision, even something small like choosing to work on the task for just 15 minutes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah Can shift the energy A little bit.
Speaker 1:And break that procrastination cycle.
Speaker 2:Momentum yeah.
Speaker 1:It's like saying you are not a victim of your circumstances. You have agency Absolutely, which I mean. I think we all need to hear that sometime.
Speaker 2:Oh for sure, Big time.
Speaker 1:Right, it's a good reminder that we're not like passive bystanders in our own lives. Yeah, we have the power to make choices that move us forward.
Speaker 2:You're in the driver's seat exactly all, right now the final card. Okay, the final card, drum roll that he pulls.
Speaker 1:Yeah is the star the star and if you've ever seen this card, it's just, it's visually stunning oh, yeah, beautiful this bright, shining star in the night sky uh-huh and nakashima. He really leans into that whole image.
Speaker 2:I bet.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he points out how you know, just the literal brightness of the star right. It's like a representation of all this unseen potential that exists for the client.
Speaker 2:Even though they're struggling.
Speaker 1:Even amidst, yeah, all their current struggles. It's like he's saying look, things might feel dark right now, yeah, but there's a whole galaxy of possibility Of that Waiting for you.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:On the other side of this deadline.
Speaker 2:Beautiful.
Speaker 1:And he connects this so beautifully back to the client's situation.
Speaker 2:Okay, how so?
Speaker 1:He's suggesting that by completing this task, the client they won't just experience, you know, relief.
Speaker 2:It's more than just relief.
Speaker 1:It's a renewed sense of self-belief.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:You know, remember that tree.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It's like the leaves are starting to unfurl and flourish again.
Speaker 2:I love that imagery.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's so vivid.
Speaker 1:It really is. He's painting this picture of, like this positive transformation. Yeah, and it's possible. It's not just about checking a box.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:It's about restoring a sense of confidence, and agency, you got this. Exactly. And then you know, he encourages the client to actually visualize their own star.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow.
Speaker 1:To imagine like that feeling of accomplishment.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah and inner peace, that's powerful.
Speaker 1:That's waiting for them.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what a great way to like shift the focus away from fear, yes, and towards a more positive outlook.
Speaker 1:Exactly. It's interesting, though, like he doesn't just leave it at that Right With that hopeful image, you know, he actually gives the client some really practical advice.
Speaker 2:Okay On how to get there, yeah.
Speaker 1:While he suggests like breaking the task down.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, into smaller steps.
Speaker 1:Smaller steps, yeah To overcome that feeling of being overwhelmed.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm Classic advice.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2:But it really works.
Speaker 1:Right, it's so effective, it's so effective Because it shifts your focus. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:From this huge, daunting project.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:To something manageable.
Speaker 1:Yes, something manageable, yes, totally. It's like, instead of staring up at this like massive mountain, you're just focusing on taking that first step on the trail.
Speaker 2:Exactly, yeah, and he also talks about support.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:And not just practical help, but also like emotional support from people who believe in them.
Speaker 1:Which goes back to, like you know, that lover's card and that whole idea that we don't have to do this alone.
Speaker 2:We're not alone.
Speaker 1:It's like he's giving the client permission to like lean on their network a little bit.
Speaker 2:It's more than permission. I think it's encouragement.
Speaker 1:Oh OK.
Speaker 2:You know, it's like he's saying, hey, seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Speaker 1:Oh, I like that.
Speaker 2:And it's also a reminder that we all have blind spots.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2:Sometimes we need that outside perspective to see things clearly.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And then, of course, there's the whole piece about you know, cultivating hope.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, which can feel a little abstract.
Speaker 1:It can, yeah, a little bit, but he brings it back to the tree.
Speaker 2:Yes, he does, he ties it back beautifully. Yeah, he reminds the client like, even when the leaves are all withered, the roots are still there. You know, yeah, gathering strength, they're still there. And that consistent effort, yes, even in small doses.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:It'll nourish those roots.
Speaker 1:It'll nourish those roots.
Speaker 2:And'll nourish those roots and lead to new growth. It's such a powerful metaphor it is for like the resilience of the human spirit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. You know, it's not just about getting through this one deadline. It's about building that foundation.
Speaker 2:Yes, of self-belief yes.
Speaker 1:That can carry you through anything.
Speaker 2:Exactly yeah. You know what I find so compelling about Nakashima's approach.
Speaker 1:What's that Exactly? Yeah, you know what I find so compelling about Nakashima's approach.
Speaker 2:What's that?
Speaker 1:He never dictates.
Speaker 2:Oh, interesting.
Speaker 1:He guides, he uses the cards as this framework for self-discovery, not as this set of rigid rules.
Speaker 2:It's like. Here are some tools and insights.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Now you create your own path forward, exactly. I love that.
Speaker 1:And it's clear from the client's responses in the transcript that they're like feeling empowered by this whole process. They're starting to see themselves as capable of overcoming this challenge. Yeah, and maybe even like growing from it.
Speaker 2:I love that Right. This session really highlights what tarot can be yes when it's used in this way. Yes, it's not about you know fortune telling. It's about self-reflection.
Speaker 1:Yeah, personal growth, and I think it speaks to like that deeper human need for meaning and guidance.
Speaker 2:We all need a little guidance sometimes.
Speaker 1:Right, we all face challenges, oh yeah, in life, and sometimes we need a little help navigating those.
Speaker 2:The rough waters.
Speaker 1:Those rough waters, the choppy seas of life. And what's so fascinating is that the cards themselves they don't actually provide the answers.
Speaker 2:Right, no, no, they're prompts. They're prompts To help you go inward.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:To trigger introspection and insight.
Speaker 1:It's like they're holding up a mirror.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 1:Reflecting back what's already inside of us, but maybe hidden beneath the surface.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and that's where the reader comes in.
Speaker 1:Yes, you know, this is key.
Speaker 2:Someone like Nakashima. They can interpret those cards within the context of what the client's going through. Yes, you know offering insights and guidance.
Speaker 1:That go deeper.
Speaker 2:That go beyond just the like traditional meanings of the cards.
Speaker 1:Yes, which is why it's so important to find a reader who, like, really resonates with you.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Someone who can hold space for your vulnerability and guide you with like compassion and wisdom.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. It's not just about the cards.
Speaker 1:It's not.
Speaker 2:It's about the connection.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:And the trust.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Between the reader and the seeker.
Speaker 1:Okay, so we've talked a lot about this specific reading, but, like, what do you think this tells us about tarot in general? Like, is this something everyone should try?
Speaker 2:You know, I wouldn't say it's for everyone.
Speaker 1:OK.
Speaker 2:But I do think anyone who's curious about exploring their inner world, yeah, understanding their patterns, mm hmm, gaining a new perspective on their challenges.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Could benefit from it.
Speaker 1:And it's not about giving away your power to the cards, right? No, no, you're still in control. You're the one in control With your voices and your actions.
Speaker 2:Totally, it's a tool for self-discovery. Yes, not a crystal ball, right, you know?
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:The cards can offer insights and guidance.
Speaker 1:Uh-huh. But ultimately, Like you decide.
Speaker 2:You decide what to do with that.
Speaker 1:So it's more about sparking that internal dialogue that conversation with your intuition.
Speaker 2:Exactly.
Speaker 1:Okay now, yeah, before we wrap up this whole deep dive, okay, I want to leave you with a question. All right, hit me. That's been like swirling in my mind ever since I read this transcript. I love a good question. You know how we always hear that phrase, like what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. But what if, instead of seeing obstacles as like these threats, we viewed them as like opportunities to strengthen our roots?
Speaker 2:I like that.
Speaker 1:You know, like those trees that Nakashima was talking about.
Speaker 2:That's a really interesting way to look at it Right. It shifts the focus, you know, from fear and avoidance to growth, yes, and resilience.
Speaker 1:And it aligns perfectly with Nakashima's approach.
Speaker 2:It does.
Speaker 1:Of using challenges as these catalysts for self-discovery.
Speaker 2:And personal development.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like saying, okay, this is tough, but it's also a chance for me to like dig deeper. Yeah, Learn something learn something new about myself and come out the other side stronger.
Speaker 2:I love it, embrace it all. Yes, the good and the bad, the good the bad, knowing that, even the difficult, stuff.
Speaker 1:it can help us grow, it can help us evolve.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:And that brings us back to you, the listener.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Think about like a challenge that you're facing right now. What if, instead of you know, letting it just drain all your energy? And feed your doubts, right yeah. What if you saw it as this opportunity?
Speaker 2:Okay, to strengthen your own inner roots.
Speaker 1:Like we were talking about with the tree.
Speaker 2:Exactly Like those trees.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a powerful way to shift your perspective it is. It's not about, you know, pretending things are fine, no, or denying that it's hard.
Speaker 2:No, it's about acknowledging that there's potential for growth even within like the struggle.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it reminds me of that roomie quote. Oh yeah, the wound is the place where the light enters you.
Speaker 2:Oh wow, I like that you know it's. It's sometimes through those really tough experiences that we we discover our greatest strength yes and resilience and going back to nakashima's approach yeah I think what's so beautiful about it is that it's just, it's infused with this like deep sense of compassion.
Speaker 1:It really is.
Speaker 2:You know he's not like judging the client for their struggles. He's meeting them where they are.
Speaker 1:Right where they are.
Speaker 2:Offering tools for healing and growth.
Speaker 1:And that's something we could all use a little more of right.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Self-compassion, especially when we're feeling like stuck or overwhelmed it's it's so easy to be hard on ourselves oh, it's the easiest thing in the world you know and focus on our flaws yeah, our shortcomings shortcomings, like all the things we think we're not doing right exactly.
Speaker 2:but what if we, what if we treated ourselves with the same kindness that we would offer to a friend? You know, yes. Who was going through something tough.
Speaker 1:I think that's a really great takeaway from this whole deep dive.
Speaker 2:It's a good one. You know, it's not.
Speaker 1:It's not just about the cards.
Speaker 2:It's about cultivating this mindset of self-awareness, resilience and compassion. And compassion, yes, for yourself and for others.
Speaker 1:Self-awareness, yes. Resilience and compassion and compassion, yes, for yourself and for others, and remembering that we all have this capacity to grow and evolve.
Speaker 2:Yeah, even when our leaves are wilting right.
Speaker 1:Yes, exactly.
Speaker 2:There's always that potential for new growth, a new beginning.
Speaker 1:A new beginning. So the next time you're feeling, you know this self-doubt creep in. Remember the tree, the tree. Remember that you have strong roots those roots, even if you can't see them they're there right now they're there down remember that you have the power to choose you do how you respond to those challenges it's all about choice it is you have the power it's about tapping into that inner strength, seeking support when you need it.
Speaker 2:It's okay to ask for help.
Speaker 1:And trusting that you have everything you need.
Speaker 2:You do.
Speaker 1:To navigate the journey.
Speaker 2:The journey of life.
Speaker 1:Beautifully said Thank you. And thank you for joining us.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:On this deep dive.
Speaker 2:It's fun.
Speaker 1:Into the world of tarot and self-discovery. I love tarot and to our listener, remember you have the strength within you.
Speaker 2:You do.
Speaker 1:Trust the journey.
Speaker 2:Trust it.
Speaker 1:Embrace those challenges.
Speaker 2:Embrace them.
Speaker 1:And never stop believing in your ability to blossom Never stop Until next time.
Speaker 2:See you later.
Speaker 1:Keep exploring.
